FIXING THE FENCE AT THE WHITE HOUSE

Three contractors were on a tour of the White House. One is from Minnesota, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Chicago. As they are walking through they notice a broken fence and ask if it would be possible to submit a bid to fix it. They are told of course.

All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The Minnesota contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. “Well,” he says, “I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me.”

The Tennessee contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, “I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me.”

The Chicago contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, “$2,700.”

The official, incredulous, says, “You didn’t even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?”

The Chicago contractor whispers back, “$1,000 for me, $1,000 for you, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence.”

“Done!” replies the government official.

One Liner

My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.