Nephew: “Thanks for that harmonica you gave me — it’s the best birthday present ever!”

Uncle: “Well, that’s great! What songs can you play?”

Nephew: “Oh, I don’t play it. Mom gives me a dollar a day not to play it during the day and Dad gives me five dollars a week not to play it at night.” 

One Liner

Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? 
Swarm.