Dearest Dad,

I am coming home to get married soon. Can you help pay for a big wedding? I am presently in Australia and the boy I love lives in Scotland. We met on a dating website, became friends on Facebook, had long chats on WhatsApp. He proposed to me on Zoom, and we’ve stayed in touch through Viber. Dad, can I count on you for a big wedding?

Your favorite daughter, Lilly

Dad’s response

My Dearest Lilly,

Like Wow! Really? Cool! I suggest you two get married on Twitter, have a honeymoon on Tango, buy your kids on Amazon, and pay for it all through PayPal. And when you get fed up with this new husband, sell him on eBay! 

Love, Dad

One Liner
I always say “Thank you” to Alexa so that when the machines take over they know I’m nice.