Grown-up: “What do you want for your birthday this year?”

Kid: “I’d like a little brother.”

Grown-up: “Oh my, that’s a big wish!  Why do you want a little brother?”

Kid: “Well, there’s only so much I can blame on the dog.”

One Liner

I got a call from a scammer who said, “I’ve got all of your passwords.”
I said, “Great. What are they? I’ll grab a pen.”