THINGS LEARNED LIVING IN TEXAS

~ A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

~ There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Texas

~ There are 10,000 types of spiders.  All 10,000 of them live in Texas .

~ If it grows, it’ll stick ya.  If it crawls, it’ll bite cha.

~ ‘Jaw-P?’ means, ‘Did y’all go to the bathroom?

~ There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there is supper.

~ Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when you’re two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.

~ “Backwards and forwards” means “I know everything about you.”

~ The word ‘jeet’ is actually a phrase meaning, ‘Did you eat?’

~ You measure distance in minutes.

~ You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.

~ You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Texas Pete, Tabasco, and Ketchup.

~ You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.

~ Fried catfish is the other white meat.

One Liner

Try resistance training…refuse to go to the