Humor – May 21

Throughout the centuries, mothers have been giving their children plenty of good advice and notable quotes. Here’s just a small sampling:  (part 2)

MARY, MARY, QUITE CONTRARY’S MOTHER: “I don’t mind you having a garden, Mary, but does it have to be growing under your bed?”

HUMPTY DUMPTY’S MOTHER: “Humpty, If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a hundred times not to sit on that wall. But would you listen to me? Noooo!”

BARNEY’S MOTHER: “I realize strained plums are your favorite, Barney, but you’re starting to look a little purple.”

BATMAN’S MOTHER: “It’s a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance is going to be?”

GOLDILOCKS’ MOTHER: “I’ve got a bill here for a busted chair from the Bear family. You know anything about this, Goldie?”

LITTLE MISS MUFFET’S MOTHER: “Well, all I’ve got to say is if you don’t get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there’ll be a lot more spiders around here!”

JONAH’S MOTHER: “That’s a nice story, but now tell me where you’ve really been for the last three days.”

SUPERMAN’S MOTHER: “Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we’ve decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so much time in all those phone booths?”

MONA LISA’S MOTHER: “After all that money your father and I spent on braces, that’s the biggest smile you can give us?”

One Liner
“Pumpkin Math”

Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of your pumpkin by it’s diameter?

A: Pumpkin Pi

Thought for the day
“Now you belong to him . . . in order that you might be useful in the service of God” (Romans 7:4 TEV).

Your call to salvation included your call to service. They are the same. Regardless of your job or career, you are called to full-time Christian service. A “non-serving Christian” is a contradiction in terms.

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