One night a teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they were appalled by his appearance: leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos, and pierced nose.

Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. 

Trying to be diplomatic, Mom said, “Dear, he just doesn’t seem like the all-American boy you’ve dated before. He’s not really that nice.” 

“Oh come on, Mom,” replied the daughter. “If he wasn’t that nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?” 

One Liner
I ate a salad for lunch today! Well, mostly croutons and tomatoes. Actually one big round crouton and tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE! It was a pizza. I ate a pizza for lunch!