I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse started with certain basics. “How much do you weigh?” she asked.
“135,” I said. The nurse put me on the scale. It turns out my weight is 180.
The nurse asked, “Your height?”
“5 foot 6,” I said.
The nurse checked and saw that I only measure 5 foot 2 inches. She then took my blood pressure and told me that it is very high.
“Of course it’s high!” I screamed. “When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I’m short and fat!”
It’s that time of year when I get to pretend the 5-pound bag of candy I’m buying is for trick-or-treaters.