Humor – November 5

12 Reasons to Buy a New Car

1. Your passenger seat is on the National Register of Historic Places.

2. Instead of an airbag, there’s a whoopee cushion taped to your steering wheel.

3. You lose the stop-light challenge to a 14-year old on a moped.

4. 15-Minute Jiffy Lube lasts for only 3 days.

5. Thieves repeatedly break into your car just to take “The Club.”

6. When you gas up, the attendant asks “Can I re-duct-tape that windshield for you?”

7. While waiting at stop light, people run up asking if anyone was hurt.

8. For the last five years, you’ve had to settle for making “vroom vroom” noises while sitting in the driveway.

9. You keep losing dates on left turns.

10. Your gas gauge measures in cubits.

11. Traffic reporters are starting to refer to you by name when discussing morning tie-ups.

12. It hasn’t been the same since Henry Ford borrowed it.

One Liner
Unless you fell off the treadmill and smashed your face, nobody wants to hear about your workout.

Thought for the day
“Stand up for me against world opinion and I’ll stand up for you before my Father in heaven” (Matthew 10:32 MSG).

In a world full of ideas and beliefs that go against God’s Word, God wants you to have an uncommon courage and stand up for what you know is true and right.


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