If the birth of Jesus was covered by today’s tabloids:
ILLEGAL ALIEN HAS ILLEGITIMATE BIRTH –
BABY EXPECTED TO BE CHARGED WITH TREASON
BETHLEHEM — It was rumored today that an unmarried couple from Nazareth stopped for the use of a manger owned by Alfredo Pinchi, a notorious local slumlord, and a baby was born.
“There was no running water, and the place was filled with straw,” commented local public health authorities. “We even found a donkey inside.”
“The mother gave birth under extremely questionable circumstances,” offered Pontius Pilate, Judean candidate for District Attorney. “She claims to have been a virgin.”
Unconfirmed reports indicate that Roman authorities are investigating the baby on charges of sedition and treason. “There are a bunch of people running around alleging that the baby is the son of God,” explained Pilate, “and that he will have some radical ideas about religion in the future.”
Three Kings from the Orient were caught on the outskirts of Bethlehem by the Roman Border Patrol carrying illegal contraband. “We caught them red-handed with frankincense and myrrh,” explained an official with the Border Patrol. “And they didn’t have any papers.” The Kings were promptly arrested and deported.
At virtually the same time as the baby was born, a bright star was sighted over Bethlehem. “This is an omen that things are about to radically change in the Empire due to global warming,” the Director of the Environmental Protection Agency commented.
Christmas is weird. What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?
Thought for the day
Philemon 1:6: “I pray you may be active in sharing your faith, so that you will have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ” (NIV).
In other words, don’t keep your faith in Jesus a secret. Tell other people about it. Invite them to church. Give them a Bible. Hand them a book or resource about what it means to follow Jesus.