~ A programmer solves a problem you didn’t know you had in a way you don’t understand.
~ An auditor arrives after the battle and bayonets all the wounded.
~ A banker ends you their umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
~ An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday did not happen today.
~ A statistician is good with numbers but lacks the personality to be an accountant.
~ A mathematician is a blind person in a dark room looking for a black cat that is not there.
~ A lawyer writes a 10,000-word document and calls it a “brief.”
~ A psychologist watches everyone else when a beautiful girl enters the room.
~ A professor talks in someone else’s sleep.
~ A consultant takes the watch off your wrist and tells you the time.
~ A diplomat can tell you to go to Antarctica in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch.
Thought for the day
During every moment of your life, from the very best to the very worst, God is with you. He cares for you. You will never walk through something hard alone. In fact, God is never closer than when you are in pain.
He tells you, “When you go through deep waters and great trouble, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown! When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up—the flames will not consume you” Isaiah 43:2 TLB