FELINE PHYSICS OR CAT LAWS 

LAW OF CAT INERTIA:  A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse. 

LAW OF CAT MOTION:  A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction. 

LAW OF CAT THERMODYNAMICS:  Heat flows from a warmer to a cooler body, except in the case of a cat, all heat flows to the cat. 

FIRST LAW OF CAT ENERGY CONSERVATION:  Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible. 

LAW OF BAG/BOX OCCUPANCY:  All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond. 

LAW OF FURNITURE REPLACEMENT:  A cat’s desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture. 

LAW OF PILL REJECTION:  Any pill given to a cat has potential energy to reach escape velocity. 

LAW OF CAT COMPOSITION:  A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-matter + It Doesn’t Matter. 

LAW OF SPACE-TIME CONTINUUM:  Given enough time, a cat will land in just about any space. 

LAW OF CAT OBEDIENCE:  As yet undiscovered.

One Liner
The chance of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.