One day down at the VFW hall, some old veterans were bragging about the heroic exploits of their ancestors .

The first declared proudly, “My great grandfather, at age 13, was a drummer boy at Shiloh.”

The second boasted, “Mine went down with Custer at the Battle of Little Big Horn.”

The third said, “I’m the only soldier in my family, but if my great grandfather was living today he’d be the most famous man in the world.”

“Really? What’d he do?” his friends wanted to know.

“Nothing much. But he would be 165 years old.”

One Liner

Outside an ice cream shop: “Scream until daddy stops the car.”