A five-year-old boy had never spoken a word, ever. One afternoon, as he sat eating his lunch he turned to his mother and said, “Soup’s cold.”

She was astonished, and said, “Honey, I’ve waited so long to hear you speak. But all these years you never said a thing. Why haven’t you spoken before?”

The boy looked at her and replied, “Up until now, everything’s been okay.”

One Liner

A friend asked what parenting toddlers is like. So, I hid her keys, headbutted her in the face, and then told her I love her more than the stars.